So you’re into the nitty-gritty of planning your wedding and you’re working on the monumental task of the guest list. Trust me, I know how overwhelming it can be. It’s going to be such an amazing day and you would love for everyone you know to be there.
But the reality is that for the sake of budget, space and sanity, having every single person you know there just isn’t possible. So you have to start paring down the guest list to make sure your numbers are in order. And sometimes that may even mean making the decisions to have an adult-only affair (no children under a certain age).
This is becoming more and more common with weddings, but it still doesn’t change the fact that it can be an awkward topic to address when you have to let your roommate from college know that they can’t bring their 3 children.
So what are some ways you can go about having an adult only wedding and tactfully getting the memo to your guests?
So does it really have to be all or nothing? Kind of. Generally speaking, you don’t want to have to pick and choose which children can come, so I do recommend if you’re going to say you’re having an adult-only wedding, it needs to be. I will say though that sometimes there is an exception for a flower girl or ring bearer.
You can start by having some wording on your wedding website that states how excited you are for the day and really want them to have a nice night out kid-free to enjoy themselves as well. Sometimes couples will opt for having babysitting services provided at a wedding as well. Your website is a great place to get all of this wording out to your guests
This is where I come in. I have learned over my many years of doing this a few tactful ways you can use your wedding invitations to let your guests know it is adult-only. First and foremost, you will want to have your addresses for your envelopes set up in a way that only the names of those invited are listed.
“Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Smith” no “and family”, no kids names listed.
If only the adults are invited, they are the only ones listed.
Next, we can have the wording “adult reception to follow” at the bottom of the invitation. This, without a doubt, let’s your guests know that kids are not welcome.
If you are still concerned about who all will be coming, you can have a spot on your response card that lets them know the number of guests that are invited “we have reserved ____ seat(s) in your honor”. You would then fill this number in with 1, 2, 3 etc based on which envelope it goes into. So if your college roommate gets it and only sees 2 listed there, she knows only her and the Mr. are expected.
I hope this has helped you feel more confident in making your decision on having an adult only wedding and how to handle it when it comes to your guests! If you want to chat about invitations, hop on over to my contact form and let’s chat!
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